Tuesday, May 30, 2017

Weapon team upgrades: the best defense is a good offense

As we bide our time waiting for wave 6 to arrive, it's time to start filling in the upgrade articles (and I need to get to those wave 5 objectives articles at some point too, oof). Let's begin with the weapons teams upgrades. Spoilers: I'll be covering the new "dual slot" upgrades (the boarding teams are an offensive retrofit AND a weapon team slot in wave 6) in their own separate article eventually, given they're a bit of two things together, so you won't find them here.

"So... we're just kind of hoping they'll fly right in front of our window and otherwise we do nothing?"
"Yep."
"Man, these Imperial union jobs are great!"

Tuesday, May 23, 2017

Minor update to the TIE Fighter article

I told you I'd let you know when things changed! We'll see more major changes I suspect as time goes on (wave 6 woot!) but I wanted to add some Vassal examples to the TIE Fighters article to both break up the wall of text towards the bottom but also to illustrate the points being made.

That's it! Probably my shortest post so far!

E-wings! Or: John gets whiny about Star Wars lore!

We're barrelling through Wave 5 right now, what with this and the Z95s being the only thing left on my end before I go back and update everything as needed.  Oh, and write up Sato, haha.  Anyways, let's talk today about E-wings and the Snipe mechanic!  (Warning, there are spoilers for Vector Prime below, along with a rather large rant about the Yuuzhan Vong series.  Keep that in mind if you're still reading that).
You can almost feel his disappointment for this pun.  I choose to believe he's disappointed in the Yuuzhan Vong series.

Monday, May 22, 2017

Imperial squadron review: TIE Phantom

Wow, we're at the final wave 5 Imperial squadron much sooner than I anticipated! It's time to cover the TIE Phantom.

We've made all kinds of improvements, like changing the billiards ball to a soda can!

Alpha Beta Charlie PELTA!

We slowly move our way into wave 5.  We, being a royal we, as Eric already did his bit on Jerry and the Arquitens.  Today, we hit the Pelta, and hopefully I can get Sato soon enough.  When I.... get to him.  (He's hard to write, OK!) I can promise I'll have him done before Wave 6 shows up (I'm running out of new stuff to write about, haha!) but for today, the Pelta.
I'm almost an angrier looking CR90! Rarrrrrr!

Lancer Pursuit Craft

Before we begin, I'd like to point out that ACTUAL original Lancer-Class Frigates were used to fight enemy starfighters, and were very un-triangle based ships that boasted 20 quad laser cannons built around-

Nerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrd!
So let's talk about the starfighter.

Thursday, May 18, 2017

Imperial squadron review: VT-49 Decimator

We're trucking right along through the Imperial wave 5 squadrons, which brings us to what is effectively a well-armed Imperial space truck, the VT-49 Decimator!

The segue was as bad as this picture is sweet!

Wednesday, May 17, 2017

Wave 5 Squadrons: VCX-100

Rather than move on to writing about the Pelta or Commander Sato, I decided to do WHAT I WANT, MOM, and start writing up some squadrons.  With Relay and Strategic being as important as they are, this is a much smarter plan on my part and not an effort for me to skirt having to write a giant blather about how I can't get Sato to work or all the different ways of using the Pelta (shifts eyes, pretends that last sentence wasn't the train wreck it actually was).  They'll happen, but I'll likely try to get them done a bit later on in the week and all.

Anyways, let's start by talking with the most important keywords from the new set, with the VCX!
If I couldn't own the Millenium Falcon..... the Ghost would be it.  So long as Chopper is there.

Tuesday, May 16, 2017

Imperial squadron review: TIE Defender

Continuing our wave 5 Imperial squadron reviews, we have reached the TIE Defender.

Okay so hear me out, what if TIE Fighters had an extra wing and also its wings were each two triangles and those triangles had lasers?

Monday, May 15, 2017

Commander's Corner/Know Your Enemy: Crix Madine

Apologies for the lateness of my getting this up, but it's been a busy weekend.  My sister graduated and got her PhD, so I attended that (and read 2 different X-wing books, because I don't care about 1299/1300 people attending that thing, sorry).  In any case, let's get this Commander review started with Crix Madine, the Rebellion's General from Wave 4.  Then onwards to wave 5!
It was 1983! Everyone's hair looked like that!

Saturday, May 13, 2017

Imperial squadron review: Lambda-class Shuttle

We're finally here at the wave 5 Imperial squadron reviews!

Before I go any further, I want to talk briefly about how John and I intend to handle Cannot Get Your Ship Out going into the future. Basically our long-term plan for the blog is for it to be half-blog half-wiki and thus we intend to update our review articles as the game releases new options that add some new facets to previously-released ships and upgrades. We also will be updating articles as our opinions change and we gain greater depth of experience. If it's more than just fixing typos or adding small asides, we will be noting when old articles get updated. This is relevant for two reasons at this moment:
1) Wave 6 should be released in about a month and it's sure to shake things up at least a little bit (and hopefully a lot, new stuff is always fun!).
2) There was a lot of stuff released in wave 5:
  • 4 new squadrons for each faction and their associated aces
  • a new ship and commander for each faction
  • 4 new objectives for each color
  • new "generic unique" and ace squadrons for all the wave one squadrons (which we've covered already)
This means that while John and I certainly have a decent amount of experience with the wave 5 stuff over the past half a year, there are elements that we're not 100% confident about just yet. As we gain more experience, we'll come back and polish some of those articles up. I'd rather discuss some things I have a few games with than wait for half a year or more before I feel like I've gotten enough experience to speak with more authority. In short, the perfect is the enemy of the good and I'd rather be good (helpful) now than wait to be perfect at some constantly-receding future date.

So with all that said, let's talk about the Lambda-class Shuttle!
"It's just a model" (or in this case, an illustration, but it's still nice)

Wednesday, May 10, 2017

Imperial commander review: Moff Jerjerrod

I've been flirting with this article for a while but its time has finally come: the Moff Jerjerrod (Jerry to his friends, and we're all friends here, right?) review!

Slow your roll Vader, some of us haven't had an article yet!

Tuesday, May 9, 2017

A Quick Discussion on Worlds and the Status of John's Blogging Updates!

"Rise from your grave!"

Hey guys

First, sorry about the lack of MAJOR updates on my end since the LMC80 article.  I'm working on the Madine one soon enough, but I will fully admit that job applications (actual reasons!) and a bit of playing Fallout 4 Sunday night (John, you lazy oaf! I don't care if you're finally at the good point in the story and have stopped doing side quests, back to the Armada mines!) got in the way.  Madine is coming, I promise, but my tomorrow is a bit busy, so it'll likely be the end of the week.  Then I'll start hitting the Wave 5 squadrons soon too.  I'll be honest, in that I'm trying to put off Sato until I can find a way to get him to work for me.  I have PLANS, but they may need a Hammerhead to come to fruition....

The OTHER thing I wanted to bring up is a recent comment on the Rieekan post from Graeme.
I'm hearing that a lot of the top rebel lists for worlds this year were reeikan lists. Might be nice to update this article with some of them if you find any. I have never used him yet but for store championship coming soon might switch from Dodonna to him :)
First, Graeme, I hope you don't mind me throwing your comment out here.  I figured it might get a little more traffic than in the comments of the Rieekan article, and it lets me blather on for a bit about it all, haha.

Regarding Worlds 2017, Eric and I and a few of our friends have talked to each other about the results and everything they entail.  At the moment, Eric and I don't plan on addressing Worlds (well, beyond this post, I suppose).  We might come back to it if/when we get time later, but at the moment we don't have anything of actual note to say about the results and lists.  We see what happened, just like you all do, and we're concerned about it as well.  From what I've heard, the people who talked to Michael Gernes (the guy actually in charge of Armada, who, if he's reading our blog, welcome Mr. Gernes!) say that he's SUPER invested in the game.  So I'm sure he ALSO sees those final standings and wants to do something about it.  He doesn't want to turn Armada into the Rieekan Game, as I think we'd all get bored Going to a Dead Man's Party repeatedly.

Eric and I don't have current Buzzfeed list plans on What Needs to Change to Keep Armada from Dying (Number 3 will Electroshock You!), as that's just us talking past each other and you, not actually contributing meaningful discussion here.  So we're not going to try to Fix Armada.  I don't have a degree in Game Design, so it's not worth it.
Degrees in Game Design come from Bovine University
The best advice I can offer at the moment is twofold: first, wait for wave 6.  Sloan is going to shoot defense tokens out from under aces FAST, and we'll see what happens to that list then.  Plus with Hammerheads and the Boarding Engineers hitting carriers, let's see what goes down there?

Second, the best thing to do to deal with it is to look at what options you currently have available.  And if you want my honest opinion, Raiders with Flechette Torpedos can get a LOT done against it in your current meta.  Eric's Raiders have squished my squadrons like bugs on a windshield more often than I can count.  I can't claim they'll solve EVERY problem, but they're a good start.  Learning to fly them takes time, but I promise that if you get deadly with them, they'll become one of your favorite ships (yes, the REBEL is advocating learning IMPERIAL ships.  I'm shocked too!).  As for Rebels, massed YT-2400s is an answer, but one I can't just keep recommending that EVERY time.  Give me some time to come up with a current solution or two for Our Side.

Lastly, we are planning on going back and updating all the posts at some point.  Especially when a new wave comes out, and new upgrades, ships, and turbolasers/ordnance (see, I can spell it right when informed I was doing it wrong, haha!) appear to be fielded on ships.  I can't promise WHEN it'll all happen, but Eric and I view this as a resource for everyone, so we want to keep it updated as much as possible.  So, alterations to articles will happen eventually?

Thanks, as always, for reading.

Friday, May 5, 2017

Imperial ship review: Arquitens Light Cruiser

We finally reached wave 5! We did it! And so now it's time to talk about the Imperial ship from wave 5, the Kittens Light Cruiser.

Cute and cuddly, sure, but kitten claws will cleave through solid steel!

Thursday, May 4, 2017

A Quick Thanks to All our Readers

So Eric and I attended a Meet-and-Greet slash viewing party for an Internet Celebrity we like last night (Specifically, Nostalgia Critic - give him a watch, he's pretty correct in ripping apart terrible movies we watched growing up.  His review of Batman and Robin is STILL right and on task with how dumb that movie was....) and during the Q&A portion, someone asked the cast a question along the lines of "How does it feel knowing you've impacted so many people's lives?"  Their response is very similar to our feelings with your guys, so I'll post ours below.

I want to say thank you to everyone who reads this blog and finds us helpful.  Eric and I started this as we just wanted somewhere we could write down all of our thoughts about the game and have an easier place to just refer people back to when we wanted to expand on a topic.  It's really easy for me to yell "Git Gud!" with squadrons as I play a game, but that helps no one and doesn't get the community to grow.  What DOES help is giving people the ability to read some ways we've found of running things, in a format that you can both read and remember at your own pace, so it's not a datadump of information for you during the middle of a game.

When people comment on our posts or on the forums saying "Thank you!" or "Great article!" or "So helpful!" it really makes us feel great, and I'm glad to know that our advice is helpful AND that people are reading us.  Knowing that we're helping people get better at the game we both enjoy is just a great feeling for us, and I'm glad that people find us intelligible enough to read and follow our advice.  If we didn't have you guys reading us, this whole site would be just Eric and me yelling into the void.

Portrait of the Artist as an Old Man
So I can keep saying "Thank you," repeatedly (John? Wordy? NEVER!) but I'll just close this out by saying "Thank you all, we're not going anywhere, we're glad you're all here reading us.  It's just great that people like us all.  May the Fourth be with you all."


Tuesday, May 2, 2017

Ion cannon upgrades: she blinded me with science!

Time to finish off our weapon upgrade reviews with the ion cannons!

Now you too can make little "blep blep" noises.

Monday, May 1, 2017

LMC80: Battle Cruise Crazy (Just Be Glad It's Him, Not You)

Well, we're on our way into Wave IV now, as we pretend that Wave III and Wave IV are separate.... and that they demand the majesty of Roman Numerals.  Let's hit the OTHER 8 health Rebel ship, the LMC80!
The ANGRIEST lawn dart